The Shaker hymn “Simple Gifts” that dates back to 1848 is one that puts into perspective how I should live my life.

Unfortunately, it took a cancer diagnosis seven weeks ago to wake me up to tell me that my life was sorely out of balance. I was blind to the simple gifts that are all around me in my daily life.

“'Tis the gift to be simple,
'Tis the gift to be free,
'Tis the gift to come down where we ought to be,
And when we find ourselves in the place just right,
It will be in the valley of love and delight.

When true simplicity is gained,
to bow and to bend, we will not be ashamed
To turn, turn, will be our delight,
'Til by turning, turning, we come round right.”

I’ve known this hymn’s lyrics for many years. Before my cancer diagnosis, the hymn’s words had some meaning for me. However, I wasn’t paying attention to the words.

The hymn humbly reminds me that how I lived when I was “well” wasn’t healthy in so many ways. The “well” days of yesterday were jam packed with work, family, and community obligations. There was little time available to reflect on the simple gifts I am given each day. I took many people and things granted.

Cancer has helped me to recognize the simple gifts I have in my life. In living with this disease, each person and each encounter I now have presents me with endless opportunities to see that life’s gifts are freely given to me every day.

Cancer opens one’s “eyes of awareness” to gifts in your life. The simple gifts have the most meaning. We tend not to notice them when we are living on overdrive in our daily lives. Cancer peels away the layers of life to get to the core of your being. Cancer peels away the layers of a person to get to the rawness of their soul.

So what simple gifts have been given to me in journeying with a cancer diagnosis?


Hubby’s Workmates

My hubby returned to work today after lovingly and attentively taking care of me in the first week of surgery recovery. Our house is now eerily quiet. I miss our teatime chats that not only warmed my tired and weak body, but warmed our friendship as well.

It’s his birthday today as he returns to work and his “new normal” in living in a family with a cancer diagnosis.

There have been many simple gifts given to him by others in this cancer journey.

His workmates collected money and bought a home meals catering service for us. This kind gesture helps me continue recuperating while he works, and removes his worry about dinner prep for several meals.

Others are reaching out to him via work and home email messages of encouragement and cheer. Some friends of his are walking with him in sharing their experiences as cancer survivors or as family members of someone who is living with cancer. A few of my “Action Heroes” are waiting to book tee times with him to ensure that he relieves some stress to help him stay well.


“J x 2” First Time Home Buyers

Life carries on, as it will. I don’t want any people in my family to stop living their lives just because of my cancer diagnosis. Living with cancer just forces you to change directions in your life in unexpected ways.

In the midst of the countdown to my cancer surgery last week, our son Josh and daughter in law Jill were given notice that the home they were renting was going to be put up for sale. It was not news they wanted to hear in a tension filled week.

But, adversity turns into opportunity. They were planning to buy their first home earlier this year, then decided to postpone doing so because of my cancer diagnosis and wanting to spend more time with me. House buying is now back on their “to do” list.

My husband and I have always been the biggest cheerleaders in the lives of our kids. We have been blessed with so many simple gifts they have each given us in their 26 and 21 years. We have always made ourselves available to help them in their needs, which are changing as their lives evolve.

We’re now coaching our “J x 2” kids in a new phase of life—buying a home for the first time.

Helping our kids to pursue owning a home presents us with many simple gifts daily. They’ve asked their dad to accompany them on open houses on the weekend to teach them about what to look for in buying a house. They send me emails with houses they’re interested in so that I can be part of this adventure as I recuperate.

Last night, they came over to excitedly share good news with us on their mortgage pre-approval and their weekend plans to see more houses. They engaged us in dialogues on how to interact with real estate agents, how to buy home security systems, the style of houses they are looking for, and the ups and downs of placing bids on houses in a hot sellers’ market.

There is a satisfaction in knowing that we did something right as parents to launch them on their journeys into fully functioning adults, and now as successful young professionals who want to own their own home. It’s rewarding to sit on the sidelines of their lives to see them successfully experience the rites of passage into adulthood, which includes home ownership.

This weekend will be busy with them updating us on their house-hunting adventures. It’s a fun time for all of us!


Baby Jaxon

Five-month-old baby Jaxon is a “simple gift” to me in this cancer journey. He greets you with a smile as wide as the Grand Canyon. His eyes twinkle with every person he meets.

This little guy is the first grandchild of our good friends of over 30 years. Their daughter and her husband let me enter into their new world of parenthood before my surgery. They invited me to take a stroll with mom and babe during one of their daily walks.

It is a moving image to see how Jaxon’s mom lovingly holds him in adoration for the miracle of life she holds in her hands. All is well with the world when you are given the gift of witnessing the love of a mother for her baby. He has been so lovingly welcomed into the world since his first day of birth on a cold day last December.

Jaxon’s laughter comes from his toes, wiggles his body in delight, and makes him gasp for air between giggles. His belly laughter is a pure and simple gift to anyone who is in the presence of his giggling. Each time I hear him laugh, my eyes tear with joy. Happy babies spread their happiness to others around them.

I look forward to more of his giggles and watching him grow.


Living Room Florist Shop

My daughter Marissa is a keen observer of life. She has always worn her tender heart on her sleeve. She has bright expressive eyes and is equally bright as a person.

This week on the day after I came home from surgery, her gift of living in the present resulted in a comment about the people who are journeying with us as a family in living with cancer.

“Mom, do you realize that since the week of your cancer diagnosis, we have had flowers in our house continuously? So many people care about you, that’s amazing, Mom!” (editor’s note: amazing but not surprising!)

It is indeed.

The beauty of nature surrounds me in every corner of the living room as I rest and recover. The flowers sprinkle their soft fragrances throughout our house and wake up our senses each morning. Simple gifts showered through nature.


I bid adieu for today, as I become more and more aware of the simple gifts in my life. I fight on with Strength, Courage, and Determination.