As I ponder my “second” life after cancer treatment, I’ve come to realize that there are parallels in how the treatment is similar to living in a cocoon.
While in treatment, the medical professionals surround cancer patients in helping them to cope in living with this devastating disease. There is a sense of urgency to fight the cancer that’s taken hold of one’s body. The medical professionals protect you as they inject you with drugs or radiation, watch your symptoms, check your blood chemistry regularly, boost your sagging sprits, and care about your overall well-being.
Then one day, after months of being housed and protected in a “cancer cocoon,” the treatment ends. The waiting is similar to that of a butterfly waiting to emerge from their cocoon--the cancer patient is finally freed to fly away to begin their life again as it once was prior to treatment.
When the frenetic world of cancer treatment stops, patients immediately transition overnight into their “new normal” life in living with a cancer history. This “new normal” life is hard to define, as it is not the same life that one lived prior to the cancer diagnosis.
In the nearly four weeks that have elapsed since my radiation, I’ve added another birthday and a new outlook to my life. I find myself feeling somewhat lost in living this “new normal” life. From the outside, I look well and could fool some people into believing that I never had cancer. There are days with moments where I feel well enough that life seems normal, and then a wave of fatigue sets in the afternoon to remind me that I’m still healing from months of trauma on my body.
There are other reminders that I recently battled the disease. My mind still has lapses of short-term memory loss because of the chemotherapy. My hair has grown back as mostly white and wavy. My eyebrows and eyelashes are starting to fill in. My physical body reminds me daily that it bore the brunt of the cancer battle’s various treatments.
Each day, I am on the rebound to build a healthy body as I work out at the gym and change my diet. The workouts have made me realize that cancer treatment recovery is a slow process, which will take many months, if not years to completely heal. My Type A personality would like the recovery to be faster, even though I know that are months of trauma to heal from, and that I have to be patient as my body rebuilds.
After three weeks, I am starting to reach optimal cardiovascular conditioning that has come from 45 minutes of daily interval training on a treadmill. This part of rebuilding a healthy body was easy. The mastectomy and months of inactivity with chemo and radiation treatments have resulted in a lack of upper body and arm strength, and range of motion. The reconditioning of my upper body is much harder to attain than heart health.
There is the weight that I need to lose that was put on with treatments. The goal is to have low overall body fat as excess fat produces estrogen, which is being blocked in my body by cancer medication.
Months of battling cancer have given me a different outlook on life. Cancer is teaching me to be patient and to slow down—both good things for my overall well-being. I’ve come out of the experience realizing that I am a lot tougher than I thought I was. My perspective on what is important in life has changed. The things that I once valued no longer hold the same importance to me that they once did. My body has changed and is undergoing its own metamorphosis to become leaner, stronger, and better equipped to fight a potential cancer recurrence.
The battle of cancer is a life-long war. I continue the fight in my “new normal” life with Strength, Courage, and Determination.
0 comments:
Post a Comment