When I first met my surgeon on March 11 to hear of the results of my biopsy and learned I had breast cancer, he made two comments: it was going to be a rough journey to recovery and my sisterhood of women will be very important to get me through it.
As it turns out, it’s not only been my sisterhood that have kept me grounded, focused on getting better, and ensuring there is more to life than just living with cancer. There have also been a goodly number of guys who likewise mirror similar support to that of the women.
Early on in this blog I named the sisterhood of supporters “The Women Warriors of the Amazon Tribe” who soon were followed by my male warriors “The Action Heroes.” They are my anchors in fighting the cancer battle.
The circle of supporters around me have been phenomenal in this cancer journey, as are the associated concentric circles of caring people that have been supporting my husband, son and daughter-in law, daughter and son-in law, and other extended family members since my diagnosis. I am amazed by the ripple effect cancer creates in the lives of those who journey with me in this disease.
From the earliest days of living with cancer, a group of cancer survivors from amongst family and friends emerged and surrounded me with sage advice on how to armor myself for this battle of life. They have inspired me, and sustained me. Most of all, they uniquely understand the highs and lows of this fight in ways no one else can unless they’ve walked on the cancer battle lines.
Then there is the legion of medical caregivers who have been the guiding lights in my fight for life. Always patient, kind, and caring they have given me a wealth of information and tools to battle cancer mentally, physically, and emotionally. They keep me alive in all aspects of my being.
Today, I am humbly thanking all of these people for the parts they each play in traveling with me in this cancer journey. I learned early on that no one person has the capacity to be all things to a cancer patient. It takes a community of supporters to fill in the many multi-faceted needs a person living with cancer has in their journey to wellness.
My Family of Women Warriors and Action Heroes
Joe, Josh and Jill, Marissa and Bryan: words can never aptly describe your daily love and presence in helping me with all of the emotions and struggles of fighting cancer.
The extended family of Women Warriors and Action Heroes faithfully fill in when there are gaps to fill. Mom, Jen and Mike, Tim and Lorraine, Pat and Jocelyn, Mom Emily, Walter, Theresa, Nestor, Christine, Veronica, Bernie and Lorna, Carolyn & Jordan, Andrea and Benjamin your love and support in all ways is precious.
Aunt Sonia, and cousins Bev and Dave, Kim and John, Lori, Adele and Mike, Myrt and Bob, Lyd, Linda, Pat, Don and Susan—your contacts by phone, email, cards, and visits have boosted my spirits time and time again.
Cancer Survivor Mentors
Friends and family who are cancer survivors hold a special place in my heart. They have been my constant inspiration as they walk with me in this fight for life. They understand the struggles in this battle in ways only cancer patients who have traveled ahead of me can fully comprehend.
Shawnda, Andrea, Jim, Dale, Ron, Barry, Cec, Rosa, Lyd, Adele, Linda, Darlene, Dave, Don and classmates in my Cancer Art Therapy program and cancer yoga class have kept me sane at moments when my world feels likes its falling apart. I know that all I need to do is make a phone call, send an email, or visit with them to keep me grounded and focused in my cancer battle.
Friends, Co-Workers and Colleagues: the Additional “Women Warriors” and “Action Heroes”
This large army of supporters has impeccable timing on when to step in as they walk with me in this cancer journey. My heartfelt thanks go out to all of them.
Friends: Linda and Dave, Marianne and Bert, Jennifer, Luba and Stan, Juliana, Vivian and Izzy, Mike and Anne, Kathleen and Craig, Nicki, Jeannette and Rick, Peter and Joan, Isabel and Wally, Joan and Henry, Lilly and Jim, Derek and Barb, Ray, Jean, Susan, Cathy, Sandy, Kim, Bohdan, Frank, Val, Don & Darlene, Dale and Claudette, Jim, Ray, Diane, Elvia, Chris and Gord
Co-Workers: Shawna, Laura, Zdenka, Laurel, Johanna, Lalie, Monique, Debbie, Audrey, Aileen, Laurel, Jane, Sheila, Rhonda, Alida, Janet, Christine, Eveline, Guizzy, Jan, Lori, Deborah, MaryAnne, Dave, Ernie, Dan, Brian, Brian, Clif, Susan, Holly, Stacie, Jo-Ann, Reagan, Tricia, Oscar, Pam, Gary, Peter, Val, Julie, Jack, David, Ron, Denise, Nancy, Darlene, and Leslie
Colleagues: Lorraine, Norva, Chris, Jeff, Candy, Regan, Rick, Shirley, Ana, Stephanie, Dawn, Jerry, Jacqueline, Doris Mae & Cam, David, Nigel, Keith, Gus, Shirley, Jorge, Marsha, Reis, Gerry, George, Tara, Trudy, Wendy, Adrienne, Kim, Lori, Liz, Sheldon, Steve, Diana, Lisa, Annette, Susan, Barb, Jan, Carol, Cathy, Carolyn, Chris, Dawn, Lesia, Linda, Lori, Lisa, Lori, Marnie, Maria, Kevin, Priscilla, Christa, Robert, Eric, Gay, Sheri, Joyce, John, Sandra, Debbie, Dennis, Glynis, Heather, Terry, Richard, Joanne, and Kara
Concentric Circles of Supporters, Medical Caregivers, Blog Readers and Anonymous Others
Colleagues, co-workers, and friends of family members have formed circles of support around my loved ones. I don’t know many of these supporters but they keep my family members surrounded with care and compassion. To these known and anonymous supporters, thank you for being there for my family. They all speak highly of the help you give them each day as they cope with being family members of a cancer patient.
My medical caregivers number over 20 people from many disciplines. They are the knowledge keepers and practitioners in treating me physically, mentally, and emotionally. They all work together as a team to keep me living.
There are many blog followers and even more readers of this cancer e-journal. Most are well known to me, others are not. I know that the number of readers of this blog is continually growing and the entries are followed from around the world.
Anonymous others range from people who silently support me through prayer groups, blog referrals from readers, and friends of friends. I am continually surprised and humbled in how this cancer diagnosis touches lives far beyond my family and me.
Staying strong in my cancer journey cannot happen without the support of so many people who touch my life daily. They give me the Strength, Courage, and Determination I need to fight so hard to live. I owe them all much gratitude.
In a few days, I will begin a new phase of chemotherapy. Halfway through my chemo treatments, the medicine is being changed to a new concoction for the remaining three cycles of infusions.
The new chemo drug is Taxotere (or Docetaxel), which was originally produced from the needles of the European yew tree and is now created in laboratories. “Taxotere Tuesday” will see me undergo treatment with this new drug. As with other chemo cocktails, this one will likely produce some side effects.
It starts off differently than the chemo of my first three treatments. With Taxotere, I will be taking steroid drugs a day ahead of time to minimize side effects, which include allergic reactions to the chemo drugs and nausea. But unlike the first round of chemo (“FEC”--Fluorouracil-Epirubicin and Cyclophosphamide), this new drug is supposed to have less nausea associated with it.
The downside is that Taxotere has the potential to affect finger and toe nails. I could lose nails, or may experience numbness, tingling, and burning in fingers and toes. It may even change how I walk. Part of my treatment will result in having ice packs placed on my hands and feet to try and minimize these side effects.
Other side effects may include fluid retention, hair loss, and the ever-present chemo fatigue. Taxotere also has the potential to create muscle or joint pain within a few days of treatment.
I can’t use Aspirin or Advil for pain relief due to blood thinners, so Tylenol is the usual drug of choice to alleviate pain. For me, taking Tylenol or Tylenol 3’s is akin to swallowing Smarties-they don’t work. To manage pain, I have been prescribed a narcotic painkiller to have on hand if needed.
My doctor warned me that I would need to fill the prescription within three days of issue otherwise it would be void. As I understand it, this requirement has something to do with controls on issuing of narcotics, which also resulted in me having to sign off on receiving my prescription when it was picked up. The pharmacist that filled the prescription advised that I will be quite dopey with the drug and that I should not drive while using it. It will be interesting to see how my body reacts with this drug when added to compounding chemo fatigue.
The chemo fatigue phenomenon still puzzles me. After nine weeks of treatment, I continue to learn and listen to the fatigue signals in my body. With chemo, there is an undercurrent of fatigue that is always present. You learn to live with being tired, otherwise you would never do anything or have a sense of normalcy in your life.
However, it is a different kind of tiredness than when I’ve been healthy. My experience with chemo fatigue has had fewer warning signs when my body is getting more tired vs. feeling tired when I have been healthy. It’s only after I have done too much in the course of a day that I recognize what chemo fatigue feels like. After a few episodes of doing too much, I am now starting to read the chemo fatigue signals more readily.
These days, my activities are lessening because of the fatigue. The only major activities I may do in a day is a handful of laundry, grocery shop, or prepare dinner. When doing any activities such as these, I get tired more easily and have to rest when they’re done. After dinner visits with family and friends have to end by 9 p.m. as that’s when my body starts powering down rather quickly.
As anyone who knows me will attest, I tend to have a lot of energy and a reputation of carrying on “non-stop” for hours at work and at home. With treatment, I struggle with how little I am able to do each day because of chemo fatigue. I often wonder about the times when I was well and how much I did in a day. I got up early each morning, multi-tasked in a demanding job all day long at work, fit in lunch hour exercise three times a week, and ran a household. I can’t even imagine maintaining this kind of schedule now.
I’m also still learning about other less mentioned side effects of chemo from members of my cancer care treatment team. One of them recently told me that the chemo steroids can affect one’s body in ways other than weight gain and fluid retention. They can make you restless (“More restless than normal?” my husband queried) and they can affect your overnight sleep. Its fairly common with chemo steroids to only get a solid block of three hours of overnight sleep and then fall in and out of sleep until morning. My poor sleeping habits are now starting to make sense because of the effects of chemo.
The chemo journey continues and enters a new phase this coming week. Like with the first three cycles, I say “bring it on.” I will continue to fight cancer with Strength, Courage, and Determination.