Strength Courage Determination

This blog "Strength, Courage, and Determination" came as a result of many people asking to stay in touch with me on my journey with breast cancer. The diagnosis was March 11, 2010 followed by a mastectomy on April 23. In the time that led from the first milestone to the second my family encouraged me to use internet technology to stay in touch with those wanting updates on my treatments. The blog steps in replacing emails and phone calls of many.

Living life with a purpose, and “showing up” in the lives of people can be a hard concept
to grasp, and an even harder one to live. When I have lived my life with purpose, joy comes and blessings overflow.

I have lived my life with purpose in putting a husband through school then supporting his career, in raising a family, in being a daughter, sister, and auntie, in being a mentor in the workplace, and in volunteering in the community. And while I may have affected others in “showing up,” being in their presence has given me countless rich gifts in my life. In giving to others, I also receive.

In living life with purpose, I have warm memories imprinted in my mind of sitting on the sidelines of swimming pools, basketball courts, and soccer pitches. I’ve witnessed the rewards of attentive parenting when attending parent teacher days. I have proud moments to savor from high school graduations, university convocations, a daughter’s wedding, and son’s and his partner’s purchase of their first home.

Joy comes and blessings overflow as I think of the many hours spent watching our kids learn about teamwork, co-operation, sharing, respect, good sportsmanship, friendship, kindness, and the pure enjoyment of water flowing around them as they learned to swim.

My life has been affected by countless hours spent in the company of many wonderful young people who filled our house with their presence as our children grew up together. Through these young people we have met their parents who became our friends. Together, we now celebrate the adult lives of our children and life’s milestones that they are now achieving. The opportunities to “show up” in the lives of adult children and their mates along with the lives of their childhood friends are treasured moments.

One of my most profound life experiences came through my daughter while she was in the International Baccalaureate program at her high school. In association with one of her world studies classes, she met an orphaned Sudanese nursing student –a “Lost Girl of Sudan,” who was living in Winnipeg without a family and few resources.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/2031286.stm
http://www.slate.com/id/2089225
http://www.ivillage.co.uk/women-refugees-the-lost-girls-sudan/80016?field_pages=1

Ang’er was introduced to us and became our “adopted” Sudanese daughter, with whom we all journeyed as she completed her last two years of nursing school here. She still lovingly refers to me as her Canadian “Mum,” when she addresses me in her beautiful Sudanese/British accent.

Ang’er has profoundly affected my life in ways no others have. In living life with purpose by spending time with her, I celebrated her triumph as she recounted stories of loss, sadness, danger, roaming, perseverance, and the will to live. She modeled to me how to live life with purpose. I was a proud “Mum” at her university convocation knowing how far she had come since she was orphaned at the age of five.

Today, Ang’er continues to live her life with purpose, having returned to her home village in Sudan. She is now married, and works as a nurse educator. Her dream was to return home to create an educational non-profit organization to encourage Sudanese girls to get an education, as only about 1% of girls complete formal schooling. She has created the foundation and continues to live life with purpose. I miss her.

Ang’er’s life story taught me about empathy and compassion for people who come to Manitoba to begin their lives again. Having Ang’er in my life gave me a new perspective on how to live life with purpose. Her affect on my life led me to continue volunteering with newcomers in our province.

Several days ago, I was honored as a board member of the Immigrant Centre http://www.icmanitoba.com to welcome members of the Eritrean community who donated a work of art to the centre, as a result of a photography project that empowered women in their community. It was a joyful sensory experience to be a part of an Eritrean coffee ceremony, and a dinner feast that honored these talented newcomer women in our city. My volunteerism at the Centre has been richly rewarded countless times in giving back to the community and in living life with a purpose.

Each day life presents me with an opportunity to live with a purpose. Each day I must keep my eyes open to the opportunities that are given to me to live my life with a purpose. Each day, I will do so with Strength, Courage, and Determination.

Cancer rehab with weekly physio appointments, daily strengthening and mobility exercises, and an array of cancer education workshops has made for a busy few weeks since my last blog. I am working diligently to rebuild my body, and to retrain my mind to improve my memory after treatments. It is a slow, arduous, and frustrating process.

In this time, I continue to learn about others and myself. The more I learn, the more I realize that “living life with purpose” is really what life is all about. Even the mundane things such as gym trips, reconditioning exercises, physio treatments, and education workshops all have a purpose in my life—to make me healthy and to prevent a cancer recurrence.

Living life with purpose has taken on new meaning for me in this cancer journey. A couple of weeks ago, a favorite author of mine, Max Lucado, beautifully summed up living a life with purpose by believing in others. His advice came in a daily e-bulletin I received.

He speaks simply on the concept of “showing up” by being present to others. In the bulletin, he challenges his readers by asking: “Do you believe in your kids? Then show up. Show up at their games. Show up at their plays. Show up at their recitals. It may not be possible to make each one, but it’s sure worth the effort…

Do you believe in your friends? Then show up. Show up at their graduations and weddings. Spend time with them. You want to bring out the best in someone? Then show up.”

As I age and gain wisdom, I hope to continue to positively affect the lives of others by “showing up” in the little and big moments of their lives—be they family, friends, or others. These “show up” moments have blessed my life for decades. My hope and prayer is that they will continue to be a part of my life for many more decades.

When I was diagnosed with cancer last spring, people “showed up” in my life, many returning the favor of when I “showed up” in their lives. Family, friends, and colleagues “showed up” with visits, phone calls, emails, cards, food, flowers, gifts, and words of encouragement. Each “show up” gesture cushioned the blow of living with cancer.

Even after treatment ended, these same folks continue to “show up” in my life in marvelous and meaningful ways. Many have “shown up” these past few weeks as generous donors who are supporting me in the Challenge for Life fundraising walk for CancerCare Manitoba on June 11. My original goal was to physically walk the 20 kilometers in the walk, and raise the required $1,000. The money was raised in a day, so I moved the target to $2,500 thinking it would be a lofty goal to attain.
http://www.cancercarefdn.mb.ca/NetCommunity/Page.aspx?pid=708&frsid=2997

As I write this blog, I have raised over $4,700 to help other cancer patients and their families in living with this life-changing disease through programs and services offered to them from Cancercare MB.

It is important for me to “show up” at this walk to support those who are fighting cancer. The physical ability to participate in the walk is confirmation that I have fought cancer and won. I am especially grateful to join my daughter and brother who are “showing up” by walking alongside me in the walk, and who are also raising money for the event. Other family members and friends are “showing up” for me at the walk’s finish line. I am humbled and deeply moved by those in my life that are supporting this project so dear to my heart.

Each day there are moments where I can live life with purpose. I will strive to continue to “show up” in the lives of others and will do so with Strength, Courage, and Determination.

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