I am beginning to think that I am sounding like a broken record. My mother says if it I didn’t have bad luck; I’d have no luck at all.

On Monday night, I had yet another episode of fever and some kind of infection brewing. This is the third infection to attack my body in four days since my Taxotere chemotherapy treatment eight days ago.

I ended up going through the drill of contacting the oncologist on call, explaining the symptoms and getting yet another prescription. Fortunately, it was the same doctor with whom I had a conversation Friday night about infection number two, and who also issued a prescription for the second round of Thrush in my oncologist’s absence on Thursday.

On Tuesday, I had a previously scheduled follow up check-up with my oncologist because of the first two infections. He believes that this third Taxotere infection came from a virus that I came into contact with, as I was already on anti-biotics.

Consequently, he recommended that I stay home and away from people (especially children, babies, and those in contact with them), and not allow anyone into our home. I am only to leave the house for medical appointments wearing a mask. My flu shot had to be cancelled until my white cell counts are high enough to rebound from it. Social and cancer therapy appointments were cancelled. All of these precautions are taking place because of low blood counts and a compromised immune system.

I am highly susceptible to becoming very sick if in I am in contact with others who are sick or have been in the presence of others who are sick.

To understand how susceptible I am, the oncologist said that being in the presence of someone who has sneezed could make me very ill. (A sneeze emits about 40,000 droplets into the air and can be loaded with viruses if the person who expelled it is sick. These potentially contaminated droplets can be airborne for several hours, and can be housed on clothing, paper, room surfaces, steel, and plastic in the area of where sneeze took place or elsewhere via air travel).

While at the appointment, the oncologist mentioned that for my second Taxotere treatment, he had dropped the strength of my dosage by one-third because of the infection complications I had with the first infusion of the drug. We are watching to see how my low blood counts bounce back with the second cycle, to determine what will be done with my last Taxotere treatment. The dosage may need to be adjusted again.

I was scared of Taxotere a few days ago, I’m now terrified of it.

Undergoing my final infusion is pre-occupying my thoughts a lot and for good reason: my oncologist forewarned that the final treatment would be a rough one to get through with Taxotere complications.


I am in my second week of being on Taxotere, round two. There are new complications since the first cycle.

I am cold in the middle of the day, most days. I am particularly cold in my hands and feet (”frozen tundra feet”), while my legs, face, and eyes feel like they’re on fire without a temperature. My feet and hands will take hours to warm up after several layers are put on and I go under blankets, all part of the side effects on my circulation with Taxotere.

My nails are starting to discolor, forming dark red spots on the tips. I have developed a strong case of heartburn that has made it difficult to drink any kind of fluids—even water or lemon-lime soft drinks. I now have a prescription to reduce the acid in my system so that I can tolerate fluids, and hopefully counteract some of the food that has been irritating my digestive tract.

For the first time in five treatments, I looked like a cancer patient this week. I have circles under my eyes, my complexion is white, and I have the pallor that one sees when people are fighting cancer. Overall, I feel awful as I try to rebound from the chemo, deal with anti-biotics in my system, headaches, and the general achy ness that comes with chemo.

I shudder to think that with low white blood cell counts and related infections, that there is a possibility that I can get really sick with a condition called Sepsis, due to my inability to fight infection. Sepsis is a bacterial infection that can come on quickly. It is caused by an infection which rages through the bloodstream, and completely overwhelms an already fragile immune system. It can originate anywhere in the body.
My footsteps are a little heavier these days, but I have to get through this final infusion. I will do so with Strength, Courage, and Determination.